Being ‘Soulmates’ Doesn’t Mean You’re Destined To Be Together

Being ‘Soulmates’ Doesn’t Mean You’re Destined To Be Together

I think a mistake that many of us who have ever heard the term ‘soulmate’ think that it is synonymous with “forever”. I myself have been guilty of such a thought, thinking that surely, if the stars aligned, if we indeed came to this planet together, eternal love must be our agreement right? 

In the last year, my entire perception around the term ‘soulmates’ has shifted immensely.

I learned that true divine love comes in as three types (or a mix): a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Now, I believe the reasons are prevalent in every relationship we create in our life, from the one we create with our barista, to the ones we create with our intimate partners. But sometimes, these intimate relationships have one specific reason and the more we accept the fact that these reasons are here for our higher learning, the more gracefully we are able to let go when the lessons are complete.

We are not tied to just one soulmate in our lifetimes on Earth. They can take various forms that do not include intimacy but do drop into a deeper place of soul recognition and divine timing. One of your ‘soulmates’ could actually be your business partner (as in my case!), or your mentor, or your best friend. We come into this lifetime with ‘soul groups’ to learn and create or clear karmic contracts together. These soul groups are formed on the Fifth Plane, where the majority of our soul’s energy resides, and before our incarnation we converse with our groups and plan out our lifetime in advance. We make agreements to meet at certain times in specific places in order to accomplish lessons necessary to our highest evolution.  

Sometimes these soul contracts are karmic - the goal is to create or resolve energetic imbalance, known as karma. Karma isn’t a “good” or “bad” thing, it is simply neutral and provides learning and evolution for the soul on its journey through incarnations. For example, in one lifetime, two members of a soul group may come together to create karma, such as one party takes the life of the other. So, to balance that energetic exchange, in the next life, the other party may be the one that takes the life of the other. Now, this is a dramatic case, and there can be much simpler cases, such as two souls coming together to catalyze each other’s growth through justice, love, or perhaps bringing children into the world. 

As with all our soulmates, we have almost always shared past lives together. That is what creates this deeper feeling of “knowing” someone; you hear of people feeling like they “came home” when they reconnected with a soulmate in this lifetime. This is because our soul, and the seat of the soul is in the heart, recognizes their energetic imprint before our human mind does. For romantic relationships, these soul rememberings can be intensified by intimacy as energies reconnect on the physical plane, and can vary according to what degree these souls are connected.

“Twin Flame” is a term that I personally have had to dissect over many processes. In my studies, we all have one Twin Flame. Twin Flames are typically the shortest lived soulmate relationships because they are specifically meant to catalyze rapid growth for both parties - think the ‘accelerated course’ over the semester long course. Twin Flames are a potent mirror to yourself, and the more Light one half is, the darker the other half is - but they are meant to reflect back to you that which is hidden from you. My Twin Flame showed me the Darkest aspects of myself, as I am the yin side to this balance, and I showed him the Lightness of him, as he has typically embodied the yang energy. These partnerships commonly do a dance of ‘runner/chaser’, and are known to come together to catalyze growth, then separate again to work solo or with other soulmates. So, they are naturally very triggering encounters that create massive shifts and leave a wake of heartache and gratitude behind (Click here to read my ‘How To Recognize Your Twin Flame’ article)

Incompatible soulmates are typically soulmates of slightly different vibration than yourself, and there was likely some connection in a past life, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it is meant to be revisited this time around. These soulmates are like the carrot on the end of a stick and will lead you in the right direction of a more compatible soulmate. Usually the separation of these types of soulmate encounters are mutually agreed upon and have less heartbreak involved as what was meant to be accomplished for this partnership was already complete in a prior lifetime. 

Then, there are soulmates that have some unfinished business. These partnerships involve energy that was left unresolved in a past life and now these souls are given another opportunity to clear the issues, or karma, that was accrued in the past. These contracts are always voluntary and eventually the two partners outgrow the relationship and move on without too much drama. The lessons gained from this partnership help to awaken both parties and they move on to other relationships in time. 

Sometimes, we run into our ‘diamond in the rough’ soulmates. On paper, they have all the qualifications to be compatible to us but one party is not fully developed, or in alignment vibrationally with the other person, such as they are married to another person, are in an intense growth period, or haven’t started their awakening yet. This can be the case if one soulmate is manifesting the other very intently and rushing Divine Timing. These soulmate relationships can work, but it takes patience and time. Many soulmates get frustrated with the process and separate, only to come back together when both parties have evolved to a higher vibration and are finally able to match each other. 

After this process, some of those ‘diamonds in the rough’ evolve into what is a compatible soulmate. Or, these souls meet at the right time, when they are vibrationally in alignment. These partnerships are full of love and understanding, and they meet each other where they are at without drama. Although there is less challenge with these contracts, as a result there is not as much growth and soul evolution. Many people choose to remain in these types of partnerships because they are simple, but some people on the spiritual path get ‘bored’ with these relationships and go out to seek their compatible life partner. 

The compatible life partner is also a fairly easy-going relationship, but has much more growth involved, spiritually and mentally because there is more stimulation. These two partners are well-suited for each other as their deep affinity and attraction for each other are magnetic on a soul level. Without words, they have a deep understanding and knowledge for each other and their processes. These are the relationships that last a lifetime. Commonly, these partners find each other through the magic of the Universe - in a natural and organic intelligence. Pushing too hard to find this person may result in a failed attempt the first (or several) times. The Universe serves this partnership in Divine Timing, when both partners are complete and whole within themselves.

Not everyone experiences the last kind of soulmate relationship. This relationship is recognizable from outside of the partnership. The true divine soulmate relationship occurs when two master souls, who have fully ascended through many soul evolutions, reincarnate together to share Divine Timing and a life’s mission. Their love is so powerful that it elevates the consciousness of those around them. It is a fission of two extremely high-vibrational souls that agree to take on a task together, helping each other achieve the same purpose. Once incarnate, they immediately start looking for each other to begin their mission. True divine soulmates recognize each others’ energy signature before they know what the other even looks like, and understand that the Universe will guide them together as long as they are staying true to their path, for these souls share the same path and will inevitably meet at some perfect juncture. 

For those of you wondering when your next soulmate is going to walk in, relax. Understand that a sense of loneliness means that someone is right around the next spiral of manifestation. It is imperative that in order to call in a compatible, compatible life, or true divine soulmate, you must be whole and complete within yourself, or you will continue to call in soulmates that are meant to catalyze growth and can leave you with more heartache. Just because you were involved with one type of soulmate, does not mean that you are meant to be with them forever. If they have left your life, it is for a specific reason and they will either come back at a new frequency, ready to meet you where you are at, or someone who is in alignment with you and your life’s direction is approaching soon. Remember: Divine Timing is not the same as Human Timing. 

Blessed be!

Jaelyn Kohl

If you are curious as to what kind of soulmates you have been in connection with, what lessons you were supposed to learn, or the nature of your soul contracts, schedule a reading with Jaelyn at www.celestial-sisters.com.